Sunday, 30 November 2014

First day of nth relationship...

When i was in college there was huge trend of filling slam books. We all did i remember one of the questions asked from me was what are you most afraid of. And i replied rejections. Little didi know never say no. 10 heart breaks. Biggest loooser in the family. Divorced, fired from all jobs and its still counting. I am on the verge of another heart break and the only thing that consoles me is that its going to be tough only initially. I wow to my self after every disasterous relationship that i wont fall for another man. But i guess god has different plans for me. Especially when i dont remember hurting someone deliberately accept my ex husband whome i could never fall in love with. And when i strarted praying at the age when i didnt even know the meaning of it. When till date everybody makes fun of my long praying hours in childhood. I dont remember not doing anything for a successful love / married life. From astrology to stones to going to different temples at different time of the days etc. Still waiting for good time to come or getting used to the bad time. I dont wish happiness for my life now because i am too old for it just normal old age and a painless death. If somebody would tell me where i went wrong it will be nirvana for me. Too much to ask for....

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